Bridge to Terabithia

I just cried because of this movie...Bridge of Terabithia. Leslie died..huhu..Jess tried to cope with the pain in a manly way...no tears.just stick to being a guy but after all its painful. He was her best friend. She was his best friend. They got no other friends but each other. Together they explore the world of Terabithia....but in the end...Jess was left. He became the king with no queen but only a princess, Marybell, his sister. I still wish, Leslie was by his side in the end but then if she did not die, i would not be able to fulfill my desire..to cry. It was worth watching. I'd like to watch "My girl" but I saw this. Maybe it's destned.

F.L.A.M.E.S

"pogi points? marami ako nun pero bakit di ako masaya?"-Rollie

I watched an old Filipino movie entitled F.L.A.M.E.S (Tameme) (1997). I was just 7 years old when this was popularized by Jolina Magdangal (Leslie) and Marvin Agustin (Butch)..See? how ancient this is?

Butch was so "torpe". He couldn't court Leslie because he got no pogi points. leslie on the other hand was an school beauty...a princess but due to a slight misunderstanding, they became friends. They started as not so good friends because Leslie was so mean that she put to shame Butch in front of their classmates and Butch,,well, avenged himself. At the Florante and Laura event, they finally became 'on'. that's it

Last few weeks, i kept on watching Filipino films like "Can This Be Love?" and "Becuz of U" of Sandara Park and Hero Angeles. Both of it were so funny and romantic but a little common love story. '_'

oOops,back when i was in elementary we played FLAMES HOPE.It's a match or compatibility test. If you got a crush, just do this! haha..if u know..

I MISS THE FEELING

..hmmm..kanina nakachat ko ang aking friend na..well..somehow special sa'ken,,,namiss ko ang kilig...crush ko kasi sya at ok kame...maraming taon kame di nagkita pero nung magkita ule kame, nagkita ule kame kinabukasan at nagkakwentuhan ng matagal. Namiss ko sya ng sobra at narealized ko yun nung kasama ko na sya. Mahabang oras kame nagkakwentuhan nun time na yun at nakakatuwang isiping ganun pa rin sya except sa mas close kame ngayon di gaya ng dati na hindi kame nakakapagusap. Inilibre pa nya ko ng burger at sinamahan na magpalipas ng oras. Siguro naging crush ko sya kasi nakikita ko sakanya yung picture ng taong karapat dapat pagkatiwalaan. Well may gf sya at wala akong planong paghiwalayin sila dahil matagal na rin sila at sa tingin ko mahal talaga nya gf nya...sadyang crush ko lang sya. Yun lang yun. Masaya ko para sakanya at alam ko "she" is a very lucky girl for having cat in her life. Ahm, sana may katulad pa nya sa mundo.

heto nga pala ang magulo nameng usapan...haha

cat:ako meron na talga baby

me:asa k aman...hahanap muna ku ama bgo baby

haha

cat:pero promise mom wag u pasbi ha

me:oh? anung klaseng baby? haha...mom k jn?nanay mu ku?haha

cat:hehehe

me:hehe k jn...anu n? anung klaseng baby? aku umamin n...may baby nga ku..haha..kaw in denial p?

cat: hahaha...baby na cat

me:haha,,kean k p nhilig s pusa?

cat:simula pag ka bata

me:ngek,,,akin n yan..patayin n! haha

cat:bakit mo paatayinp...kaw talaga

me:3p ku ln,,hehe...c michele din me fb?

cat:share kami bakit?

me:ahhh...hahuntingin ku sna...haha...imbayt ku ln....2h kun makapagtanung para amang my gagawin aku masama s asawa mu..nku nku nku

cat:hoy

me:bkit?hoy k din!

cat:papapolice kita

me:ngek...bkit?

cat:wala lang...hehehe

me:adik ka! wag k kc mag drugs ha? bad yun tsk tsk

cat:kc your not an animal lover lagot ka sa pet...drugs

me:haha...eh my pet nga ku fish eh!

cat:fish ball!!!!!!!!!!

me:ui hanap ka work ha? tas svhen mus ken kun madali ln para kapag madali apply aku pag inde...inde...haha...FISH nga! d ku nga lng lam uri...

cat:fish ball nga un uri!!!!

me:bangag! haha..inde fish crackers,,haha

cat:okaya naman fish fellet!!! hehehehe

me:haha,,puo pagkain..para mu n ring cnavng an takaw ku..haha

cat:ou nga ur using ur pet para matago ung pagkatakaw mo hehehehe...hahaha

me:haha,,,adik...kaw n ln papatayin ku para d mu n ku akusahan...haha

cat:hehehhe..adik

me:tawa? tawa? tawa? anu ku clown?hahahaha...kaw an adik...bleeeeeehhhh...2wing kean kaw my pasok s skul?

cat:bleeh ka din d ako clown ikaw kc u make me happy hahahha

me:nageenjoy ka maxado...clown pala ku ah...oh! magbayad k n ng talent fee ku! haha

cat:tsaka piso lang naman tf mo eh

me:piso k jn...me kasalanan k p sken...d mu q binati nun bday ku..grrrr..gift ku?haha

cat:ai ou nga pala happy bady

me:tapos n...bleeeehhh..gift ku?

cat:sa ka na...pag bday na ulit sorry late pag bati

me:tsk tsk...ocge...hmmm..alis muna ku...punta ku skul..paxray ULE..grrrr

ayun..angulo di ba? ang usapan lang talaga namen trabaho...bigla kame napunta sa hayop...natutuwa ko na marinig mula sakanya na napasaya ko sya kahit nasabihan pa kong clown ng baliw na yun..haha...pasalamat sya...kinikilig ako sa kanya...ang baduy..kadire...grrr

Walang Titulo

patawad dahil ang gusto ko lang siguro gawin ngayon...malungkot...Hindi ko alam...pero nakakalungkot...nalulungkot ako..dahil ba ito sa video ko na tinanggal ng youtube? hindi ko alam. Dahil nagbrown out kanina? ewan ko lang. Dahil di ko nagawang ipost o tapusin man lang yun speech ng pasasalamat para sa mga bumati sa'ken? hanggang ngayon ginagawa ko pa rin. Dahil ba sa mga masasamang balita sa tv? di ko alam. Dahil ba nababaliw na ko? siguro nga.

Hindi pwedeng malungkot ako ng walang dahilan pero pano yun? eh wala naman akong dahilan para sumaya? Yung puso ko...parang...parang may kulang...hindi kumpleto. Hindi nagpafunction ng maige. At para bang ayaw...ayaw gawin ang bagay na matagal na nitong dapat nagawa kung hindi lang nabigo.

Minsan...sinubukan kong magtiwala. Akala ko totoo. Yun pala...hindi ko alam. Siguro may part na totoo pero panandalian lang. Niloko ko ang sarili ko, niloko nya ko. Hindi yun ganun kasakit dahil mga bata pa lang kame nun pero yung epekto siguro habang buhay na...Minsan gusto kong maniwalang may totoo pa sa buhay ko. Na balang araw pwede na ko magtiwala uli at di na mabigo. Na may magtatagal...pero alam ko naman in the first place ako talaga ang problema kaya hindi nangyayari yun eh. Kasi masyado ako attached sa past experiences ko. Iisa lang ang tingin ko sa lahat. Kahit kaibigan ko kasi natraydor ako kaya bakit pa ko magtitiwala? Kung ang kaibigan ko natraydor ako, anu pa ang iba? Kung minsan naiisip ko, masarap siguro mag open up sa isang di mo close. Makipag one on one tagayan.Yung taong kilala ka lang sa pangalan at sya din ganun at pagkatapos...kalimutan na ang nasabi. Umarte na parang walang naganap. Masarap siguro yung ganung feeling.

i mis my old self. Yung maldita, war freak and very confident. Yung kayang ipagsigawan sa madlang "ang ganda ko". Yung BABAENG AKO. Yung TUNAY NA AKO NA GUSTO KO ITAGO SANA...pero kasi hindi ko kaya. Ang dami ko gusto itago, itapon, kalimutan at ibahin. Pati nga gender preference ko minsan eh.

Ang totoo naiisip ko na rin minsan mag pakalalaki pero...ayoko eh. Lahat ng girls sa paligid ko, akbayan ko man, ibeso beso, lambingin, sabihan ng iloveyou, banatan...lahat sila...hanggang dun lang. May ibang lumalapit pero alam ko pa din siguro ang gusto ko. May mga nagiisip na lalaki ko and last November 15 lang..natanong ako sa inuman..."Kaibigan mo si loid, kaibigan mo si pearl, si nher, si mads, you've been with them and everyone knows kung ano ba talaga sila eh ang gusto ko lang malaman..curious lang ako, may girlfriend ka din ba?" at ang sabi ko lang..."Gusto nyo talagang malaman? ok sige. (tagay alak) NBSB, NGSB". yeah, maniwala man sila o hindi, tanungin man nila ang lahat ng butiki sa bawat sulok ng bahay namen o isama na rin naten ang nanahimik kong unan, pati na rin si Mr. Kupido...TOTOO yun. I never had a bf nor a gf. I've never been in a romantic bond. I have never been in a mutual partnership. Siguro nagkaron ng romance pero parang joke lang dahil wala namang nagtagal. Hindi ako sigurado kung nainlove na ko pero i admit, may gusto ako. Nagkagusto. at syempre hindi gaya ng movies, hindi ako nagustuhan.

Three main reasons bakit di pa ko ngjojowa.

1. hindi ako maganda.

2. hindi ako sexy.

3. hindi ako ma appeal.

in other words, di ako interesting. Sa twing may kwentuhan, ako yung "OO NGA. GANUN NGAYON","OH? GANUN PALA YUN? NOW I KNOW".

nakakatuwa. nakakabangag.

hmmm...Siguro malungkot ako kasi...wala akong taong mapagsabihan na malungkot ako. Kasi may mga taong nagsasabing "Andito lang ako para sayo..makikinig ako" pero pag sinimulan mo magkwento ang sasabihin lang nila "ok lang yan" at hindi naman sila talaga nakinig. Kasi may mga taong yayakapin ka habang umiiyak ka pero tatawanan ka lang. Kasi may mga taong sila lang ang pwede pakinggan pero di pwede makinig. Nalulungkot ako kasi life is unfair.

Pano naman ako? Naghahanap ako ng taong nakakaalam na hindi lang saya ang meron sa ngiti ko kundi lungkot, galit at kalokohan. Yung taong pwede ko isama sa sinehan ng di pinipilit. Yung taong pwede tumambay kasama ko sa kung saan saan. Yung taong makikinig din. Yung taong kaya akong tingnan ng mata sa mata hindi lang para sabihing may muta ako kunde para din sabihing "Bakit ka umiyak kagabi?". Yung taong pupunasan yung dumi sa labi ko hindi dahil nahihiya syang makita ng ibang taong may kasama syang madungis kunde dahil ayaw nya ko mapahiya. Yung taong magbibigay at pag suklian mo, itatago yung sukli. Yung taong kahit kaibigan ka lang at forever na magiging kaibigan lang sa buhay nya...hindi ka pababayaan. Kahit may iba ng nakahihigit, may puang pa rin sa puso nya kahit kunte...kahit kaibigan lang. Yung taong di ka iiwan kahit naman kinaibigan ka lang para lang makasama nya yun gusto nya talaga. Haha..too bad...walang ganun.

Ang kalungkutan ku...wala kumpara sa iba. Nakakatawang kalungkutan. putek ang drama.

my BIRTHDAY GIFT

wow! my dad gave me a birthday gift...a GUITAR!..wooohhh...last few months, I'd been encouraged to learn how to play a musical instrument...When I was a little girl, I learned how to play a xylophone and a piano (coz i usually receive musical instruments as a birthday gift) and then when I was in Grade 4, I learned how to play a bamboo flute. This flute was given to me by my father. That time, I was fond of playing My Heart will Go on and Voltes V theme song. After several years, here I am...GUITAR...I couldn't remember how to play the musical instruments i used to play and now I'm back to zero...but my dreams kept me inspired so I would work hard on this. I even downloaded video tutorials from youtube...I hope I could learn this before Christmas so I could sing along with my friends and compose more songs...Right now, I still got no picture of it but maybe I could post here a picture of my precious gift some other time...

ohh! While I was in the c.r, an idea visited my mind. "Series of Fortunate Events and Emotional Hells"...hmmm...this could be a good title for a movie..or a novel or maybe a rock song...I'll think about it...

You Are the One

this is a film of sam milby (will derby) and toni gonzaga (Sally Malasmas).

Sally was a civil servant. She was working at NSO but then her family believed that she would have a better life in America since all the members of her family lives there so she tried to apply for an American visa but then it was denied by the consul, Will. They met again when Will went to NSO, where Sally was working, to look for the files involving his mom's friend but then he failed to get the information he needed. Friendship started to conquer them when sally found out that the persons Will were looking for, were his mom and dad who abandoned him when he was young. Together they looked for Will's parents and the enemy-friends became lovers but like all other stories, time came for them to separate. Sally saw Will slept with another girl. She was hurt so much and this added to the reason why she finally decided to go to America. Will tried to apologize to her but they ended up arguing. Will said he couldn't love because he did not deserve it for he was incomplete. Sally made him realized he was wrong...that he was the problem...that the answers to his questions were supposed to be answered already if he did not waste his time...that he deserves to be loved and he should not refuse the coming of love to his life.

Will tried to stop her from leaving and said the words "Mahal kita" to the girl who caught his attention, for the very first time of his life.

lesson? Everyone deserves to be loved. There is not a single human being in this world who shall not receive or give love to another. It may be hard but soon...you'll realize it is not that really hard at all...you just have to accept it. Another thing, go for that someone who loves you completely and not just someone who completed you. Love...you don't have to struggle to get that "completeness" before falling in love...sometimes all you have to do is to let the love bring sunshine...or maybe rain to your day. Remember, in college subjects, there's this what we call "INC". Even if your professor has given you this remark, you can still get the other subject on the other sem and do the completion later. Right?

the BLOG story

Hi there…

As if someone reads this…as if someone cares about this

People simply don’t care about my existence so why should I bother?

Today I came to ask myself,” why am I doing this???”, “why am I blogging?” despite the fact that no one reads this aside from me…

They create blogs to express themselves. They create blogs to gain popularity. They create blogs to teach. They create blogs to help. They create blogs to gain money. They create blogs because they simply love doing it.

I could express myself. I could gain popularity. I could teach. I could help. I could gain money. I simply love doing it…but…

I did not want this to be known to everyone.

In blogging, I could freely express myself. I could type whatever it is that’s on my mind without being judge by people around me. I could be an emo. I could be a fearless tigress. I could be a well known actress. I could be an applauded musician. I could be a famous singer and dancer. I could be a director and script writer of my own movies. I could be a cook of the “muy-bien” foods. I could travel…travel in my OWN WORLD. The world I created for myself. A world where I am appreciated and praised. A world where I could be whatever I wanna be. A world where my hopes and dreams lie hidden.

Blogging is my safe haven. It is like a secret garden where only I,me and myself can notice. In this garden, beautiful flowers grow and die naturally. Trees erect strongly and not a single storm could put them down. There’s a well in the middle of it that produces sweet water. The walls are too high and scary on the outside but if you look at it closely, it’s just a plain old wall beautifully created despite of its age.

I am JINKY. I am not proud of myself. I am not beautiful. I am not smart. I am not a rich kid. I HATE MYSELF. Whenever I walk, I look down. I grew up despising myself. I am sinful. I am not a good person. I encountered a bunch of broken promises, shattered dreams, busted heart, and hopeless mind. I am a loser.

And blogging…this is my world. This is where the loser me wins. This is where the defeated me stands again. This is where the rejected me rises again.

Blogging, for me, is like undergoing a therapy. I am the patient and still, I am the doctor. I cure myself here. Since I started blogging, I tried to move on from my past defeats. I tried to be someone I am but I could not show to others. I tried to fulfil my dreams here and I’m glad…I found myself again. I was able to dream again. Little by little, I found happiness. For now, I couldn’t say I am completely happy…nor contented. However, blogging filled somehow the incomplete me.

Tada, Kimi Wo Aishiteru

I just watched another movie that made my tears flow like a river..."Tada, Kimi Wo Aishiteru" (Just loving you/ Heavenly Forest). Makoto Segawa was fond of photography. Because of this, his friend, Shizuru engaged herself to photography as well. Shizuru had been very vocal about how she feels for Makoto but she was not Makoto's type. The apple of the eye of Makoto was the beautiful Miyuki. It was so painful for Shizuru but then she tried to make it ok. She told Makoto that she wants her love to make his love fall for him. In other words, she wanted Makoto to be happy with the one he loves. Another event took place. Shizuru's brother died and she ran away from home. Makoto offerred his house for her to stay. They became closer. One event led to another. One night, Shizuru asked for a birthday present from Makoto. She asked Makoto to kiss her as a birthday present. The next day, they went to the forest where they usually took pictures. They kissed and that day was the last day he saw her. That day he realized that he was in love with her.

Two years had passed. Makoto suddenly received a letter from Satonaka Shizuru inviting him to her first photo exhibit in New York. He went all the way from Japan to America. There, Miyuki met her. She said that Shizuru was in L.A for work and he believed in it. The next night, he found out that he would never ever see her again. She was sick. A very rare disease. The person who got this dies when he or she falls in love. She fell in love with him. She didn't want him to know about her disease. She wanted to mature for him and sadly...such thing killed her. She wrote many letters for him because she wanted to live inside Segawa even if she was already physically dead.

You hold happiness for another person in your hands. Somewhere in this world, a girl is waiting to receive that happiness so you have to make sure that girl gets the happiness you hold.-Miyuki

Farewell always arrive before the realization of our feelings but still everyone always tell me with a smile: “Goodbye, see you again.” -Shizuru

I hate boys who makes a girl happy then suddenly spoil the moment and then worse, send them to emotional hell. I hate people who pretend to be numb, deaf or whatsoever. I hate guys who send one away and then chase her, welcome her as if nothing happened...I hate guys like Makoto.

If you like him or her...just say it...if you can't then show it.

If you don't like her, do the same thing!

It's hard but it's harder for her coz you're bringing her into an emotional roller coaster!

Miss You Like Crazy- You're Beautiful

the last shot of my yb addiction..i haven't shared this yet on facebook but Im glad that 8 creatures, as of now, had already viewed it,,,so nice...thanx to those 8 people...

Tibetan Personality Test (from facebook)

Just a few minutes ago, i answered a personality test on facebook...below are the questions and the results...just wanna share it..

1. Put the following 5 animals in the order of your preference:
(type digits from 1 to 5):

a. cow

b. tiger

c. sheep

d. horse

e. pig

2. Write one word that describes each one of the following:

a. dog

b. cat

c. rat

d. Coffee

e. sea

3. Think of someone, who also knows you and is important to you, which you can relate them to the following colors. Do not repeat your answer twice:

a. yellow

b. orange

c. red

d. white

e. green

4. Finally, type your favorite number, and your favorite day of the week:

a. Number

b. Day of Week

and then the result

1-st question. Priorities in your life:

1: FAMILY
2: MONEY
3: PRIDE
4: LOVE
5: CAREER


2-nd question:

friendly implies your own personality.
sweet implies personality of your partner.
disgusting implies the personality of your enemies
hot- It is how you interpret sex.
vast implies your own life.


3-rd question:

sis - Someone you will never forget.
loid - Someone you consider your true friend.
strawberry - Someone that you really love.
matt - Your twin soul.
jigz - Someone that you will remember for the rest of your life.

You have to send this test to as many persons as your favorite number (1) and your wish will come true on the day that you recorded (friday).

--quite real? eh? haha

Miss You Like Crazy- You're Beautiful (behind the LIGHTS)

I'm done with my last video of You're Beautiful...well, I am just trying to move on and control/limit my addiction that's why I made this video. I am so thankful to all those people who watched my previous videos. It inspired me to work on more ideas. Actually, I am planning to make my own short movie and hopefully, my CASTS would help me with such project.

hmmm...right now, i am uploading the MISS YOU LIKE CRAZY- YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL video on youtube and then below is the other video of mylc. I didn't chose it because I think the second video I made is better. Anyway, I wanna share it with you....

Two Faces of My Girlfriend

This movie and the movie My Sassy Girl have one thing in common. Both of them are all about reminiscing a past love. A love that is eternal. A lover who...died. At first, happy stories are discussed and suddenly, you’ll just find yourself crying.

Gu Chang is a man who has never been in a relationship. He believes that “Love never lasts. It does nothing but hurt you. It always expires too soon.” but then one day, he met a 20 year old girl who had lost her wallet (Gu Chang kept it and used the money to buy some food). What seemed to be a perfect relationship suddenly became horrible as Gu Chang found out that his girl had multiple personality. From the sweet cute girl Anni, she becomes the tough hard headed Hanni. This time, he had to deal with two girls, Anni and Hanni, but are there only two girls? NO. Anni’s real name was Yuri. Three years ago, she went to Antarctic with her boyfriend but then when she came back home, her boyfriend was no longer with her. He died and Yuri blamed herself for such event. When the body of Yuri’s former boyfriend came, Gu Chang decided to let go. When Yuri came back, Anni and Hanni left.

Right i don’t know about love. But I know what it’s like to be dumped. There are many people who suffer from broken hearts. And I live with two of them. My mom and sister...Being dumped isn’t a good thing. Without getting over him, you can’t be happy.

Why is love like raindrops outside the window? Because they evaporate. Not only do they evaporate...they leave stains behind. That’s love.- Hanni

Anni: what’s the relationship between us?

GuChang: You’re a cigarette and I am an ashtray

Anni: Why am i a cigarette?

Guchang: Because I house the trouble that you cause.

Anni: So if i burn all the way, you’ll throw me away?

Guchang: How can an ashtray throw a cigarette?

Memories. Sometimes they are more important than the material things around you. The memories of a person so dear to you, they are more important than the first rose he had given you, the first stuff toy he bought for you, the precious ring he asked you to wear. Those things they are nothing without the memories in it. How that person gave those roses to you, how that person surprised you with that cute stuff toy, how that person touched your heart when he asked you to wear such ring. Once you lost those memories, it will be as if you died.

You used to stare at his or her beautiful eyes but now you are watching him or her from a distance

You used to embrace him or her but now you can’t even touch the tip of his or her hair strand

You used to talk to him or her all day but now you can’t even greet him or her

You used to do this, that, those but now...all of them are just “used-to-be’s”

Marrying High School Girl

Another Korean drama I watched in youtube. WOW..it was so funny and worth watching,,,

The started with tale about an extra ordinary princess who could ruin the palace with her cry...She fell in love with Ondal and up to the present she was still looking for Ondal. Pyongang (Lim Eun Kyeong ), a high school girl of the present got so desperate to find Ondal (Eun Ji Won) to prolong her life. However, whwn she found him, the guy refused to marry her for they were both young. Even their parents were against it so Pyongang and her friends looked for a way to win the heart of Ondal and his family. In the end, Ondal married Pyongang. She got pregnant but still attending school. After few years, they brought their child to a psychic for Nakrang, their baby girl, loved to destroy drums. The psychic said, she ought to find a specific man and marry him or else she'll die. AGAIN???

I got these lines from Pyongang

"Rose nebula-its an eternal rose that never falls.It's forever beautiful as love"

"If you want to find your real love, it will appear before u someday"

haha. So funny...and...FUNNY..haha

Stolen- You're Beautiful (Tae Kyung and Mi Nam/Nyu)

I thought it would be alright to upload this video but then I did not know that this one got a copyright issue...it is so sad...i uploaded a video to express my thoughts and share it to others but then..it feels like i did something wrong...it feels like i should not have uploaded this...

I worked hard for this and i even dedicated this to those people who watched my video...I wish i could make my own video...

i wish...

i am so sad...

Simply IRONIC

Hi there..again?!haha,,,just wanna share what's in my mind right now...Well, this time it's a movie plot...

Simply IRONIC

Jian is an out-of-school-youth and a car expert. She loves to fix cars in her mini garage. She got this extaordinary charisma with GIRLS! ohhhlala...yeah! girls NOT BOYS! though everyone knows that she is...well, she REALLY is...a GIRL. Her best friend, as how she calls herself, Mia is her former maid who has decided to live with her after her boss, Jian's father kicked her out because of "negligence". There's this young girl in town who used to be Jian's schoolmate who has a huge crush on her. That girl's name is Sha Jin. Sha Jin has an older brother who is a lawyer named, Eun Ha. Eun Ha after discovering that his sister is obsessed with Jian (whom she thought a lesbian...), he went home all the way from America. He went to Jian's place. At first, he just get there just to investigate but then suddenly, they went into an argument.

After, more rough days with Eun Ha, Jian's father suddenly came and asked her to come back to their mansion again. Jian is a daughter of a business tycoon so she belongs to a prominent family...a family of LAWYERS but then a year ago, she dropped out of law school and left her grandiose life. Her father thinks that a year is enough for her "playing". In the end, Jian left...because..."I may be the first one who left but then...you're the first one who...simply...stopped caring". Unknown to Jian, this conversation was heard by Eun Ha who happened to pass by during that time.

At night, Eun Ha went to Jian's place to look for his sister. He saw Jian and felt guilty. Jian asked him if he's busy, since he's looking for his sister, he said yes and then he left feeling so confused. While he's driving, Sha Jin called and informed him that she's home already. Eun Ha went back to Jian's place and saw her drinking soju, alone. He tried to stop her but she's just too stubborn so he decided to drink with her instead. Things changed since then but they still argue because of Sha Jin and so many excuses from both of them who couldn't admit to themselves that they like each other and sure, girls in town will NEVER admit this...

Tarot Reading

I visited the Astrology.com and then had a tarot reading....The Tarot card said....

The Looking Back position reveals past experience, challenge, or issues that may have an influence on current perspective or level of intimacy.

The King of Wands (reversed) in this position suggests that your love life may have become dull, unoriginal, or uninspired, or your relationship devoid of passionate expression or commitment, but not necessarily of love, and a midlife crisis or selfish pursuits might have led to infidelity or an excess of indiscretion. None of this needed to be, however, for it could have been that injury, illness, depression, sexual dysfunction, or a lack of direction was the culprit that led to such acting out or instability.

The stress or burden of having gone in so many different directions, trying to keep up, or with others relying on his support, motivation, style, or morale could have become debilitating or even patronizing, and there was a chance that with his creativity stifled, his power disrespected, or his liberty restricted, the energy of this King could simply have become unplugged from the relationship altogether. Rather than being a prime example or paragon of a virile, productive, dominant "man's man," this King could have come to be a "poser," appearing scattered, compulsive, suspicious, nostalgic, or disorganized; a "one hit wonder" turning a blind eye or deaf ear to the truth, or using what was left of his charisma or charm to his own ends or to salvage his dignity.

With interference to his routine or ritual, or with his honor, reputation, or position at stake he might have attempted to relive the glory days or prove he's still got "it" through indiscriminate, abusive, unprotected, or self-destructive thrill seeking crusades of sex, drugs, or rock n' roll, lashing out, or other examples of "living dangerously" (or its counterpart of self-righteous abstinence, denial, or excuses) that kept him on the move. The bottom line however, might have been a bruised ego, performance anxiety, or a deflated sense of sexual prowess, desirability, or purpose, particularly if there were issues with follow through, procedure, or control.

As a visionary influence, he was encouraged by visible results, pats on the back, or the feverish, passionate frenzy he incited in others, but without these, or without his props, gadgets, instruments, tools, or toys, he could have had difficulty reigning in his restlessness or intolerance. He might have felt censored, abandoned, embarrassed, old-fashioned, or trapped, or without an audience, home or fan base to give him value, or to revive and renew his energy and confidence.

Ultimately, this influence simply may not have been able to rise to the occasion, challenge, or competition, or keep up with the changing rules in the game of love, and how he got through this could have been dependent on the way you responded or reacted, or your willingness to have found an alternate approach.

CARD NO. 2

The Self Portrait position offers a look at inner strengths, hindrances, interests, experience, or self awareness that may affect results, your romantic status, or that may stem from your prior history.

The Seven of Chalices in this position suggests that you may have come to a place in your life where you are asking yourself what it is you really want out of your life or relationships. Something has caused you to reflect on where you have been headed, and whether or not it really has meaning or value for you. It could be that you are realizing that your dreams are right at your fingertips and are yours for the taking once you can identify then claim what it is you really want. Choices abound, and may, at times cause you to feel overwhelmed by your options. Temptation may be around every corner, and you may feel enthusiasm to take on every challenge or every cause, but you are being reminded that these life choices have been yours for the claiming at all times. There is no need to rush. Relax, get yourself grounded, and think carefully about where you want to place your focus and energy, for what you Will can be yours.

CARD NO.3

The Where Am I Now? position reveals possible developments, situations, difficulties, or challenges that you may be encountering in your relationship or love life, along with practical suggestions for getting the most out of this current phase or experience.

The Strength (reversed) in this position suggests that issues with self-respect, control, anxiety or an inability to accept yourself could cause you to be inflexible or impatient with others. You may resort to force, manipulation, threats, nagging or impulsive confrontations. But if you could bite your tongue for a moment, you might be able to see the big picture or be receptive to a solution.

---let's just say it's quite real

Happiness in Me

Wow! I couldn't erase the smile on my damn cute face (lolz..) because of the result I obtained from uploading the video I previously posted here....After 13 hours, almost 30 person already viewed my video..It makes me wanna cry and please give me a bunch of blankets before I do..haha...For many, It's just a small number and compare to other videos, mine is not that good and is not worth watching however Im thankful to those who appreciated it (from the very bottom of my cold heart)...Idolized or Despised, either way it was recognized...

Because of this, I will now continue making PROJECT JINX NO. 3! the MISS YOU LIKE CRAZY- Tae Kyung and Mi Nam/Nyu version...Ill be looking forward for more viewers....again,,thank you!

Expect for more vidzzz! ciao!

What Hurts The Most- Tae Kyung and Mi Nam/Nyu

oOooolala..this is my second video..this is not supposed to be my second vid actually....hmmm..I was just inspired to create another video despite of my busy sched....so far no one's viewing it aside from me and i will not expect a thousand viewers...All i want to do is to do something that makes me happy..that's good enough for me...anyway, expect for more vidzzzz....ill continue doing my MISS YOU LIKE CRAZY YOURE BEAUTIFUL project..wahahahahaha....LOL...

Stuff Toy with the song Invisible (Taylor Swift)

oh!this is the video Im referring to in my previous post...Its in Filipino so its kinda exclusive for those who can understand and speak Filipino....as of now, Im the only one who watches it...haha

Stuff Toy-"Invisible" by Taylor Swift

hi there! (though no one's reading this aside from me...still wanna greet...=))

hmmm...i'm thinking about what to write today.There are too many thoughts inside my mind and I find it hard to process those crazy thoughts but then I chose to write a happy story for this hour...only for this hour..haha...it's called as PROJECT JINX...

PROJECT JINX is my project.haha...whatta short description???!!Seriously, I want it to become the label or title of all the stories concerning my hobbies (exclude watching movies please...). Last week, I started to make my own video. Its not a "grandiose" video. Actually, its just a video message dedicated to no one in particular....but i do admit that that video contains the words, which eventually became a sentence and then a paragraph that described whatz up with me during the video making. I decided to dedicate my free time in making those videos to bring happiness and if possible, contentment in my life.

I cannot say I'm okay now. Before, I thought...if I dare say I'm okay, everything would be okay as well but then I was wrong. Hmmm,,let's just put it this way. I chose to move on and save the other drops of tears from falling but it didn't mean that I stopped caring. I still care but then I knew where to place myself. It's loud and clear. Clear enough for a slow learner like me to understand. =)

Anyway, please watch out for my next video. I'm working on two projects now. The first one is the "Letter to Peter" and the other one is the "Miss You Like Crazy-Tae Kyung and Mi Nam/Nyu version".

Goodbye by Jang Geun Suk

You're Beautiful OST Lyrics

What should I do? I am just watching you
I can’t even say a short farewell
You hold on to my cold hands
But now I have to send you away
What should I do? You are going far away
My heart is filling with tears
Even though I try my best to hide it, I can’t
This heart I couldn’t catch, what should I do?
Don’t forget the memories we loved
Even if you find another person that makes you smile
Even the painful farewell, I am glad that it was you
Gathering all my sad tears, good bye
There was nothing I’ve done for you
Sadly, only scars are left
The person who encompassed my changed heart
Now I have to send you away, what should I do?
Don’t forget the memories we loved
Even if you find another person that makes you smile
Even the painful farewell, I am glad that it was you
If the tears fall because it is so painful to endure
Don’t forget the happy memories we shared
Even if you find another person that makes you smile
Even the painful farewell, I am glad that it was you
My love that I can’t reach, now I have to send you away
The only person that can make me laugh is you
Even if love is so deep and the heart hurts so much
Don’t forget the happy memories we shared
Even if you find another person that makes you smile
Even the painful farewell, I am glad that it was you
The thing that I could do with all my sad tears, good bye

LYRICS IN ROMI KOREAN

Eoddeokajyo baraman boneyo
JJareun insa jocha geonnaelsuga eopneyo
Siridorok chagaun nae son jabajujiman
Ijeneun geuman bonaeya hajyo
Eoddeokajyo meoleojyeo ganeyo
Gaseumgadeuk nunmulman chaoneyo
Aesseo gamchwobwado meomchulsuga eopseoyo
Ggeutnae japji motan imameul eoddeokanayo
Saranghaetdeon geu gieogeun noji malayo
Dasi utge hae jul dareun saram mannado
Apeun ibyeolggajido geudaera dahaengijyo
Seulpeun nunmul mowaseo annyeong
Amugeotdo haejunge eopneyo
Motnagedo sangcheoman namgyeotneyo
Byeonaegan mam jocha gamssa anajun saram
Ije bonaeya hal geudaereul eoddeokanayo
Saranghaetdeon geu gieogeun noji malayo
Dasi utge hae jul dareun saram mannado
Apeun ibyeolggajido geudaera dahaengijyo
Sumi meojeulmankeum apawa nunmul heulleodo
Haengbokaetddeon geu gieogeun noji malayo
Dasi utge hae jul dareun saram mannado
Apeun ibyeoggaji geudaera dahaengijyo
Datji mot tal nae saram ijen bonaeya hajyo
Ojik nareul utge hal saran gedaebbuningeol
Sarangi gipeojyeo maeumi apawado
Haengbokaetddeon geu gieogeun noji malayo
Dasi utge hae jul dareunsaram mannado
Apeun ibyeoggaji geudaera dahaengijyo
Seulpeun nunmul mowaseo naega hal su itneun il annyeong

-this song, though korean, touched my soul...I greatly appreciate this song and because of this and other korean songs, I was inspired to compose songs and to study korean as well

Happy Life

hmmm..despite of my busy sched due to my nerve-wrecking and mind-cracking assignment-digesting 30 cases for obligations and contracts, I was able to watch another musical movie entitled Happy Life. As always...a korean movie again...(oh c'mon...just let me be happy even just for a while)...It was a story about rock band which reigned 20 years ago and now they already have their own families. If not because of Sang Wook's death, they would not meet again. the funeral seemed like a reunion. Ki-young the lead guitarist of the band, Active Volcano, wanted desperately to bring the band on stage again. It was refused by his bandmates at first and when they tried to audition for the first time after 20 years, they were all dismayed because it seemed like their magic was gone and they were rejected. Fortunately,in the process, Hyung joon, Sang Wook's young son helped the three seniors make the volcano active again...in the end it was a success

This movie, just like the Baby and Me, tells us the stories of a father to his offspring, a husband to his wife and a son to his father but don't get me wrong, this is not only for boys.

A divorced man...

An unemployed father...

A small earner father

An orphan...

all of those..

watch this movie and realize that MEN DO CRY...

simplySIMPLETON

I thought seeing "it" with another was just fine

I thought watching "it" from a distance was enough

I thought making "it" happy would bring me happiness as well

but

reality came to me again and woke me up from this dream

all the "i thought's" had vanished and sadness welcomed me again...

I am not fine seeing "it" with another creature

It was not enough to watch "it" from a distance

It would not bring me happiness when I made "it" happy

I am not a hypocrite but I do admit that I am a simpleton...

I wish I never knew "it"

I wish I could I forget all about "it"

I wish I could be

with "it"...

oh damn!...so stupid!

My Name in Different Languages

Korean name:

Surname : Korean surname is the
last number in your year of birth .
- 0: Park
- 1: Kim
- 2: Shin
- 3: Choi
- 4: Song
- 5: Kang
- 6: Han
- 7: Lee
- 8: Sung
- 9: Jung

Middle name : is your month of
birth .
- 1: Yong
- 2: Ji
- 3: Je
- 4: Hye
- 5: Dong
- 6: Sang
- 7: Ha
- 8: Hyo
- 9: Soo
- 10: Eun
- 11: Hyun
- 12: Rae

Name : is your date of birth .
- 1: Hwa
- 2: Woo
- 3: Joon
- 4: Hee
- 5: Kyo
- 6: Kyung
- 7: Wook
- 8: Jin
- 9: Jae
- 10: Hoon
- 11: Ra
- 12: Bin
- 13: Sun
- 14: Ri
- 15: Soo
- 16: Rim
- 17: Ah
- 18: Ae
- 19: Neul
- 20: Mun
- 21: In
- 22: Mi
- 23: Ki
- 24: Sang
- 25: Byung
- 26: Seok
- 27: Gun
- 28: Yoo
- 29: Sup
- 30: Won
- 31: Sub

---Hmmm...since i was born in November 16, 1990, my name is...

Chonum PARK HYUN RIM amnida...=)

Chinese name:

Surname (first character)

Yu

Given Name (middle character)

Zhan

profound

Given Name (last character):

ning

repose, serenity, peace; peaceful

---this one is my Chinese name

Wo shi YU ZHAN NING!

Japanese name

Shinki Yu/ Jinki Yu

---this one is my Japanese name

watashi no namae wa Shinki Yu".

Italian Name:

Giacinta Giordano

God chose your birthday for a reason.

Mi chiamo Giacinta Giordano!

---Some day, I will travel the whole world to know my real name in different languages!that's a goal!

Vedic Relationship Guide

· November 16, 1990

· 05:50 AM

· Manila, Philippines

Your Attitude to Relationships as Shaped by Your Birth Star or Nakshatra Swati

Swati is the fifteenth Nakshatra and is ruled by the north node, Rahu. It resides in the sign of Libra and its Western star name is Arcturus.

You have an extreme need to maintain harmony and balance in relationships and you avoid conflict and struggles at all costs. You may also avoid taking a stand because of your fear of confrontation and subsequent failures of relationships. Normally, once you find something in common with someone, you stay close for some time. However, your relationships normally lack depth and can't withstand turbulent phases. Even though your relationships may appear to be working fine from the outside, these may lack passion and intensity. You avoid thinking about the problems in a relationship, as you are always worried about the negative consequences of bringing things up.

You have a long-term perspective on building relationships. You like to plan and move slowly, but steadily. You do not mind making small sacrifices, even if the immediate rewards remain uncertain. However, many times such relationships may not move forward because of the lack of consistent nurturing. It is difficult for you to seize on the rewarding relationships, as your efforts remain scattered across many possible choices.

You love the social interaction and are known for your charm and grace. You are a born diplomat and you know how to go around the difficult issues without getting too involved. You are also known as a peacemaker and have the uncanny ability to help conflicted people see each other points of views and resolve the disputes. You can go to any length to fit into prevalent social and cultural structures. You are a conformist in every manner of social expectation. You will go to any length to maintain such an exterior even at the cost of your instincts and authentic self-expression. Profound social networking is very often the cause of your rapid business success. Your yearn to constantly improve your financial status at all costs, which can cause the deterioration of beautiful relationships in the process.

Once you are in a relationship, you make an immense efforts to please. You believe in going with the flow and are very polite in expressing your contradictory views. It is very rare for you to have confrontation, so your relationships move ahead slowly, over time. You have an urge to learn and to create value for those you are in relationship with. Normally, you are quite happy to see those you care for do well, and receive the rewards they deserve.

However, you need to be aware of the dangers of indulging in worthless and self-destructive relationships. You can learn to manipulate or get manipulated in your urge for reckless materialistic growth. You need to look for the people whose presence can help you foster and grow your talents. You should also work on cultivating a higher self-esteem and creating a stronger sense of identity.

---maybe, it's right...im slow,,,"SLOWLY BUT SURELY" is not applicable in my style...im just plainly SLOW...nothing's next...ha-ha.I still believe in true love...eeeewww its kinda corny and very old fashioned but yes i admit...i still believe in it but at the same time, i believe that it's not for me. he-he,,,

---oh m'n..let's just stop talking about true love,,,it feels awkward...