i'm afraid to fail
i don't want to imagine myself talking to my dad and tell him i fail..
i don't want to face my brother and tell him i'm giving up
i don't to talk to my friends and spread the news that i can no longer be with them
a lot of things...
these and those that are hidden and unsaid or even unrealized...
...are my lifelong fears...
failure-something i don't want to hear and experience but i just can't escape from..
it seems like it haunts me every now and then...
and very embarrassing to say, it always finds me
my thesis bugs me...
I got some huge problems about it...
...i'm afraid to fail...
but feels like there's no safe way for me...
Sometimes, i just want to give up and tell my dad...sorry..in advance
My dad is the sole reason why i don't want to fail
why,all my life,i fear "failure"
I want him to be proud of me
I want to see the light i see in his eyes whenever my siblings bring home their medals
...all these years...my only goal is just to make him proud of me...
...a simple thesis...yeah very simple...
funny for others that a girl like me is now acting like this just because of her SIMPLE thesis..
I HATE MYSELF
